Granddad Anderson's Place

Let me try to describe the rich experience of a very special childhood growing up on the west side of Conneaut Lake in Northwest Pennsylvania during the war years of 1040 and beyond.

Old_Train We called Granddad's summer house, 'the big house' cause next to it, granddad had a smaller cottage for family which we called 'the little house'. Life back then was in many ways similar to that depicted in Little House on The Prairie. Grandad had been born in the west in 1870, so his values and way of life were the much like the Engle family depicted on TV.

Behind and beside the main houses were flower gardens, a vegetable garden, an orchard, grape arbors and more. Behind that, freshly scythed fields blended gracefully to my uncles house, a tennis court and stable for Bill, our horse (the stable would later be converted to a summer cottage).

Behind the tennis court was acres and acres of woods interspersed with open fields, a creek, a small swamp and a much larger swamp. A single train track formed the east and north borders of granddad's property. Twice a day the train came. Once heading north, the other south. A loud growling churn and rhythm of the old steam engine, the whistle, the deep rumble as the earth shook and we ran to wave at the conductor, fireman and brakeman.

My cousins and I loved to watch the trains go by. We counted all the cars and wondered with all the roar, soot, smoke and cinders why some of the older box cars or maybe our woods didn't catch on fire.

Hidden near the middle of the woods behind the giant yellow pines granddad had planted on the west side of our property was a fairly small and incredibly picturesque swamp which formed a kind of border to the back of the woods. Then behind that more woods, a larger swamp and creeks full of minnows which we caught and used as bait to go fishing.

There was truly an incredible richness and beauty to growing up touching both nature firsthand and the emotions of the depression, the war and a tangled family. We vividly experienced, smelled, tasted and felt this fine countryside before, during and after the War Years of the 1940's.

As he had done in the few acres north of the big house, granddad had planted dozens of both scotch, yellow and white pine trees, spaced about 75 feet apart as the orchard blended to fields and the woods. There were about 5 rows of these beautiful pines with about 8 trees in each row.

Further back in the woods, behind this group of pines, there was a brief meadow, then two small sand pits. A mile or so back to the west came the real woods, the little and big swamps. From white birch trees to old hickory stands, there were maple, oak, elm, and a dozen more kinds of trees. We experienced nature as God had made it.

There were wild elderberry bushes and hazel nut bushes. Lots of rabbits, squirrels and immense flocks of birds. Pesticides weren't in use yet, so some of the bird flocks darkened the sky with hundreds, sometimes even thousands, of birds. From wrens to robins, from purple martins to crows, blackbirds and starlings your ears told you you were never alone. For my 10th birthday granddad gave me a book by John James Audubon so I could identify and learn about these beautiful and amazing creatures that could actually fly.

Before I had got my own 22 rifle at about 11, I had a Daisy BB rifle. The bad birds which ate our corn and destroyed to garden became targets, but of course bb guns don't shoot very straight or very far, so the birds escaped easily. When I got a little older I got a 16 gauge shotgun to make sure the blackbirds and crows actually left a little corn for our family.

We didn't really shoot the birds, but the sound of the shotgun would scare them away. We even made our own scarecrows, but our home make scarecrows didn't really work too well.

Crows are pretty smart, and I got the feeling they were up there making fun of our efforts to chase them away. The birds got some corn and we got some corn. In the late summer and early fall, fresh corn on the cob was added to the garden grown green beans, peas, carrots and fresh fish from the lake. In the fall the apples ripened. We even had a few peach and plum trees. Add the grapes, the grape juice that grandma canned, the jams and all the rest and you had food like most folks today can not imagine.

The scents of our meals cooking mixed with the flavor of the two wood stoves, homemade bread and rolls, and of course pies. Except for things like flour, granddad's shopping list didn't have many other foods on them. The ice man brought the ice for the ice box, the milk man the milk and there was no such thing as a supermarket. Granddad even made his own soap!

We hunted and fished and explored and camped overnight in those woods. There were few mosquitos back then, as there were no bug sprays but thousands of birds (and bats) which kept the mosquitos in check. At night we went to sleep to the sounds of crickets and awakened to the sounds of morning doves and the breeze whistling and rippling though the birch trees were we'd put up our tent. After the war, we got a big army surplus tent that you could actually walk around in. With kerosene lamps and an old card table in the tent I'm sure folks could hear our laughter miles away.

At the east end of the property was (and is) the lake. There granddad had planted willows along the shore. Back then he owned about a mile of lakefront, from just north of fireman's beach all the way up past the old sea scout point.

There were only a few motorboats on the lake back then, and the fishing was unbelievably good. I never heard of a fishing license. Maybe kids didn't need them.

Weeping willows along the shore and even one at the end of the dock was planted later when I was born in 1938. The waterfront was just east of the old railroad track and ten wooden steps led down the cinder bank of the rail road tracks to the waterfront. Mint grew next to the steps and at the base there was a small plum tree. To the left were three 30 or 40 foot high pines the remained untrimmed all the the way to the ground. The triangle of pines made a great hiding place when we were very small.

The shore willows grew very large and sometimes we'd have storms so violent they'd actually blow down half or much of a willow tree. Back in the woods the downed trees were removed, so as they rotted they became a great place to get grubs. And those grubs got us fresh perch, rock bass and once in a while a small mouth bass.

At the south corner of the dock and waterfront stood granddads boathouse which held 2 rowboats. One for the grand kids, the other one granddads fishing boat which we weren't allowed to use or even touch because he left much of his gear in the double bow rowboat.

Heading west from the big house there was a huge elm tree and there two 30 foot ropes supported a wonderful wooden swing. West of and in front of the swing was a small eight sided tool house, where granddad kept his rifles, tools, and fishing poles. And yes he kept the tool house locked although he never locked the house. The rope on the swing was so long you could almost soar over the top of that toolhouse. And last I looked, 70 years later, it and the other houses were still there!

Next to the tool house was a glider. Atype of swing that would hold six people were people could relax in the shade of a hot summer day. Along the fence south of the little house was a small four person glider made just for the kids. What other granddad in the whole USA was so thoughtful? But then he had 39 grandkid and I knew them all. Kids like me and my 38 first cousins just on granddads side of the family.

West of the tool house was our food supply: granddad's garden, apple orchard, chicken coop and the split log we cleaned the fish on. Between the chicken coop and the garden was a 10x10 compost pile. You didn't buy fertilizer (or much else) in those days, you composted your garbage with fallen fruit, cut grass, food scraps, chicken guts, fish cleanings and goodness knows what else. Remember, there were no garbage men and no garbage service. What we couldn't compost we recycled (yes even in those days). The government needed the tin cans and more to make tanks and bullets to win the war.

There was a big and very old RCA radio in the big house and a smaller one, a Philco, in the little house, but thank God, there were no TV's yet. So our time was spent touching nature, feeling the earth between our fingers, hearing the sounds of planet earth around us, smelling the freshness of cut grass and tramping through autumn leaves. We actually tasted the richness of fresh grown food. We hugged those we loved and we cared deeply about everyone and everything. Our emotions were as rich and strong as the flavors of life and living.

About a hundred feet west of the big house were white painted lattice fences covered with grape vines and rows of roses, pansies and other flowers. Granddads favorite hobby was flowers and his second favorite (next to fishing), was grafting trees. We even had a black walnut tree after all the black walnuts in the U.S. perished in a blight. And somehow he crossed a black walnut tree with a butternut tree. Never heard of those things? From the birds to the trees, from the wood stoves to home baked pies and a gentle good life in rocking chairs and lawn gliders, we've lost so much in 21st century America.

North of the big house was a smaller 'circle' a gravel circular path with hedges, flowers and hanging mulberry trees where we could hide on a hot summer day and share the mulberries with the birds. My aunt Kat and uncle John Dearing had their wedding in that flowered cirle. There were even a few humming birds which fascinated me. North and Northwest of the circle was our driveway, that had a larger circle with a dirt road around it. South of that was a row of popular trees graddad had planted, some of which stand a hundred years later.

Our horse was named Bill. I learned to ride when I was about 5 by climbing on ole Bill and going round and round that same dirt road circle. I guess I was blessed, I even got to help clean Bill's stable!

North and West of the circle were more rows of pine trees, yellow pines bordered to the west with a that 500 foot row of popular trees.

As I got older, we scythed those fields all summer long to keep the place looking nice. There was no such thing yet as a riding mower or even a rotary mower and we didn't have a tractor.

I think I made as much as 10 cents and hour, but eventually I worked my way up to 25 cents an hour. 25 cents would buy a milkshake and hamburger and I thought granddad paid me pretty well. After all the room and board and beautiful grounds and surroundings and even the woods, were all free.

As briefly mentioned at the west end of the orchard was a small shed where our horse, old Bill had a stall. Later after the war, ole Bill died and Granddad converted the shed into a small cottage and traded it to my father for a new 1947 Dodge which cost my dad, a Dodge dealer, about $1600.

roadhome

Just east of that cottage to be was Uncle Wes's cottage (William Wesley Anderson) which he owned jointly with my Uncle Arie )Arial Kasooth Anderson). Arie and Wes didn't get along too well but they were great uncles to us kids and as different as 2 brothers could be.

Wes loved to party and he played ragtime piano better than anyone I knew then or later. We'd sit in his living room for hours begging for just one more song. Arie, like his twin brother Ave (Avery Anderson) was quiet, reserved and very kind. Like Ave, Arie and Wes both died of heart failure in their early 50's, an age when many men died back in those days.

They left widows and fairly young children to grow up with no dad. It was the early to mid 1950's when most of the great family men who meant so very much to me, passed away.

My granddad too, in December of 1954 was gone from this earth and since I had long been abused by immediate family, my life was suddenly shattered beyond belief. But the story of the abuse is related elsewhere, this blog is for the good, better and best memories.

And these tens of thousands of fond memories vividly live on in me today.

Grandma had passed away in 1948 and although my parents were alive, by the mid 1950's I was and I felt very much alone.

My Uncles, Aunts and Grand Parents had instilled in me the love of hard work, respect, values and quest for knowledge that would support and carry me though my life. Although I was abused by my mother and siblings, I was truly blessed to have the rich family ties and experiences I speak of in this blog.

Today our society seems in many ways not to know what some of those subtle emotions and feelings are or mean and sadly not to have the depth of caring, sharing and feeling to comprehend or understand what it means to really be alive.

Footnote to this story:

Today when you walk back through those woods of my childhood, briars, brambles and muck and stagnant water have taken over and you get eaten alive by the mosquitos. The borough's and state's pest control tried and still try to kill the bugs, but of course the chemicals used for control killed most of the birds, and the bees, and so today there are no elderberries, no hazel nut bushes, and lots and lots of briars that have grown up in the open meadows and fields we once flew our model airplanes and kites in. The effects of man's meddling with nature are felt by all of us as cancer from environmental chemicals has gone from a rare disease to the 2nd eading cause of death in America.

Rachel-Carson

When I was 25, I read Rachel Carlson's Silent Spring. I began to understand how fragile our world is.

Rachel, a brilliant biologist, author and one of the first environmentalists, was born the same year as my dad.

She even grew up in the Pennsylvania woods not far from where I did, and died at only 56 from Cancer, a very rare disease in 1964 the year she died. We didn't listen then, we obviously don't listen now. The 'Silent Spring' Rachel spoke of grows more silent every day.



Photo Credits: 1920 Employee Photo of Rachel from the Fish and Wildlife Commission (Public Domain photo).

Tonsils And Wild Bill Phillips

Yuma

I was about 13 or so and found myself not in the smoky city in Pennsylvania, but far away. I had gone out west for the first time in my life I saw real cactus and a clear blue sky like I never knew existed! I was in Yuma Arizona, and I had come to get my tonsils out.  Free.  The Dr was my uncle, better known by the local townsfolk as "Wild Bill". 

Wild Bill didn't really look much like a surgeon or a Doctor. He drove a dusty old Jeep, wore clothes covered with the same desert dust, even had built a log cabin way out in the desert near Ferguson lake. And yes, he did have a house in town.

Day before the surgery Uncle Bill took me to see an autopsy, saying it would toughen me up yes but it would also help teach me compassion and appreciation for the miracle of life.  And at that time, I thought I too wanted to be a Doctor.  The autopsy was of a young black woman who had died needlessly Bill said. "Cause she didn't want to go to a Dr.", he paused. "Maybe she thought she couldn't afford a Dr".  Then he gave me a long lecture about how young MD's applying to work in his clinic sometimes cared more about money first and maybe helping folks second.  It really bothered Bill that they had it the wrong way around cause in Bill's words "a doctor shouldn't worry about how much he'd make.  He should worry about his patients and how best to help them".

And he said, "If they ask me about how much they will make before they ask about what medicine they will practice, I won't hire them". 

Tonsil day came. We went in the back door of the hospital or his clinic, I don't remember which. I lay down on the table. An anesthesiologist was there and the drug of the day was ether.  "Boy, you need to count backwards from a hundred". I didn't get far. I was out like a light.

I woke up laying on a bed in the back bedroom of Bill's house with a heck of a sore throat.  How he got me back to the house I'll never know. When I tried to complain about the pain, Bill's comment always was "A little pain won't hurt you boy. Its time to be tough.  Its time to be a man."

A dinner we'd have something he didn't buy in any grocery store.  Words I would hear would be "Boy, be sure to spit out the buckshot".  Ducks, geese, deer, and more graced Bills table.  And my Aunt Helen was a great cook and incredibly kind and tolerant person.  She's met Bill when she was a nurse and still took his calls at home, telling more than one caller how to handle their problem until Bill got home and could call them.  And yes, many of his patients had his home number, which after all was in the phone book.

A few days after my tonsils came out I was hanging on for dear life, tearing across the desert with Bill clutching the wheel. He somehow pushed that old jeep at what seemed like full speed across the rocks, ditches, ravines and faint trails in the sand.

We were on our way to a cabin he had built "upriver".  He said the 40 foot logs he built the cabin with had been shipped down from Oregon.  Later I found myself fishing on incredibly beautiful backwaters of the Colorado and later jumping in an old wooden barrel the stood outside Bill's cabin that was full of rainwater (for a quick bath). 

The air was clean, the stars were brilliant and I knew I was in God's country. 

Over the years I went back to see Wild Bill.  But not enough times.  Sometimes we'd go with Bill's friends down to fish in the Gulf of California, sometimes to Bill's log cabin on the backwaters of the Colorado, but on every trip, my ears were graced with Wild Bill's tales of hunting and fishing trips and the younger generation of MD's that cared far more about money than their practice of medicine and their patients. 

They don't make too many men today like Will Bill Phillips.

The Hiding Place: The Old Wooden Boathouse

In the distance there was a boathouse, beide the dock with with willow tree Way in the distance, near the center, in this photo is a willow tree on a dock. 

Once upon a time, fifty years ago or so, there was a boathouse next to the dock with the willow tree.  It was Granddad's boathouse.  In the boathouse, there was one fishing boat for Granddad, and one rowboat for the grand kids.  And I was one of those kids.

But we had to be older to use the kids boat and the outboard motor. The boathouse was one of our secret hiding places.  For me and some of my cousins.  Long before we had tried our fingers twisting the dial of that old combination lock.  We did it for years trying, trying hard to figure out the combination to the darned lock on the boathouse door.  But in vain. 

So we did the next best thing.  We swam in under the doors that opened to the lake, the doors the rowboats used to escape their prison.  Inside we laughed and giggled and took down the fishing poles that hung on the wall.  We fished for turtles, sunfish, perch, crayfish and even dogfish, the last two of which weren't fish at all.  Using granddad's fishing nets we tried for hours to catch minnows so we could fish off the dock with real bait.  We dried Indian tobies on the front of the roof where they couldn't be seen and we smoked those same horrible tasting tobies that we had borrowed from uncle Wes's catalpa trees.  Of course we did this during granddad's nap time.  Else we'd have been in more than a heap of trouble, we would have been chastised with firm words from a granddad who loved all of us more than anything else on our planet.  I know this because of more than the tears he shed during the war when the first of my cousin's was killed and all the time Granddad spent with me. His hopes and heart resting in his hand gently on my shoulder,

The rowboats made creaking and rocking noises as waves bumped them around in their stalls.  And I'm quite sure we must have made some noise that could have been heard outside the boathouse with all the fun and whispers and laughs as we played.  One time we even managed to haul down the old 1/2 horsepower Evenrude motor and mount it on the back of the kids boat, and pretend we were on a adventure going up the lake.  Of course we had no gasoline and didn't start it back then.  And of course Granddad knew we were playing in the boathouse and never said a word.

A few years later, with a lot of pulls of the rope, the old Evenrude did start and with granddad's blessing we were off to adventure up by the islands with dreams of pirates and excitement beyond belief.  Several times we would then make the long journey home again with something called oars and slightly blistered hands.  Sometimes one of us would swim alongside the boat to see just how far each of us really could swim.  When I was ten, I made it clear across the lake and was very proud. 

I remember getting sick one of those summers, maybe from too many Indian tobies, just after the war.  Especially I remember our family doctor stopping by every day to see how I was doing.  He stopped every afternoon because the afternoons were when he made his house calls. There was no health insurance then and the doctors fee was a dollar or a piece of pie. I last saw him about 30 years later when he was in his 70's and still making house calls.  But by then he was charging $2.  He gave me a lift that day in the 1970's and we had to stop on the way home at one of his patient's houses or I would have never known just how much his fees had changed.  But of course, he hadn't changed a bit.  

Looking back on those days is a wonderfully pleasant experience for me, for our lives were full of such incredible and fun experiences and we had so much and none of it was measured in dollars.

The old boathouse is gone and so are those rowboats and many of the people who once rowed them.  But the lake is there, the dock and willow tree is still there, and so are my memories of growing up in and playing in a boathouse in a special country called America.

Sailing To Heaven On Comet #2762

 

Sailing At The LakeSomewhere, not so very far away, living in the shadows of my soul is a haunting of the finest of worlds, the best of hopes, the best of dreams. It was America. It was not long after World War II.

I was 14, and the war was over. My lifelong savings were maybe $250 or so. A tidy sum in those post war days.  One sunny day in late spring, I there was a for sale sign down the street. In the backyard of a neighbor's yard, just sitting there, was my lifelong fantasy. But this fantasy was very real, and for the stunning sum of $200 (a lot of money in those times), I haggled more than a bit and managed to actually buy this sailboat. And yes it really was in need of a fair amount of work. It was called a 'Comet', and had a main sail (torn a bit) and a jib. The number 2762 was sewn in 8 inch high letters on the giant nylon sail and engraved in the centerboard housing. Above the numbers on the sail was a five pointed star with 3 lines trailing behind.  An emblem.  Of a Comet.  My Comet.

The hull hadn't been painted in years, the mast was more than a bit warped and most of the ropes and some of the halyards and fittings were missing.  So I hurried off to the local hardware store and bought a scrapper, a brush, sandpaper, some varnish, some mahogany stain and some white paint, blue paint for the decks, silver paint for the centerboard and a smidgen of bright red paint for the bottom.

Broke, happy, perspiration in my eyes, my arms growing more than a bit weary, I scraped and sanded and sanded and scraped and scraped. For days and days and maybe even weeks.  Bees buzzed in the apple tree over my head. And in the shade of granddad's favorite Golden Grimes tree, I carefully sanded and painted the outside of the hull and decks. Then I varnished the inside of the hull, then the mast and boom, tiller and rudder.  

Thank goodness, things didn't cost much in those days and the sweat was free.  I worked for my granddad and he offered me work, a needle, some thread and a quiet voice imbued with a quiet, very subtle encouragement.  A man of great fortitude, granddad spoke few words, his heart did the speaking.

Then one happy day the paint was dry, the varnish pretty hard and with my excitement floating about as high as pure joy can soar, my cousins and I lifted this double planked dream onto one of granddad's fishing boat trailers. Then pushed and shoved and pulled and strained to capture this dream.  Down our little street, down the hill and splash, into the water.

I would be sailing in a little while, or so I thought, as my boyhood fantasy became something of a tiny yacht. Merrily it floated and bobbed for the first time in years.  Seconds later, the water rushed in between the double planking and in minutes, my trust failed, my heart sank and my fine yacht settled very low in the water, barely afloat.

I knew better, I had helped granddad paint his rowboats for years, but had hoped the great job I imagined I had done had sealed the planking and that this great sailing ship wouldn't leak too much.  I attached a rope to a concrete anchor I had made by pouring concrete into an empty paint can, tied the other end to the boat and sat for what may have been hours just admiring my Comet.  The water did its job.  The wood swelled for a few days, and with an old tin bucket, I bailed and bailed.

Then one very windy and sunny day, I put the mast and sails on and sailed away ... I sailed away with friends, cousins, and fine looking girls for nearly 20 years with that old boat. 

Many times it nearly tipped over as it plunged ahead in high winds and sudden thunderstorms and hot summer days.  Many times I and a girl friend would sail in the moonlight caught in the gentle night breezes, gliding silently toward the moon on our Comet.

I married one of those friends that claimed to share that fine dream.  Even my kids enjoyed the thrill of the wind, spray and water riding our Comet to the sounds and echoes of cold waves slapping the double planked wooden hull.

My pictures of that boat and those wonderful times, like all physical things, have faded and the few friends still alive tell me that I'm pretty old now.  The Comet's long gone, and so are my wife and kids who somehow vanished as silently into the night as old 2762.  One of these days, I guess maybe I'll vanish too, but till then, I sometimes feel the wind in my face and I remember...

A Boyhood Awakening: The Courage, Joy And Tragedy Of Memphis

Memphis Her name was... Well maybe its better that for now I skip her real name and just call her Memphis.

Memphis was maybe 14 years old, about my own age way back then.  It was the birth of the 1950's when music was soft and sweet and so were the girls.

She was from Memphis and my uncle Chris's niece - but not related to me. So I felt I should at least try to get the courage to speak to her and maybe even try to hold her hand. I had just met her and somehow I was emotionally in a twirl, in a world of feelings I had never known. A world of very vivid senses that somehow I had never really experienced. A warm type a caring that was strangely different.

When I walked onto my Granddad's screened in porch, she was sitting there quietly. Sitting on the porch across from my Grandma's rocker. Sitting on the big white wicker chair looking out over the lake. She seemed intense, focusing on the view of the dock, the boathouse, willow trees and the lake.... But she didn't seem to want to look at me.

I was not so bad looking or so I was told or perhaps imagined. I sure was looking at her. Then she spoke very very softly to me. Almost in a whisper. Her eyes were bluer than blue. Her hair was golden and my heart was fluttering and pounding so much I couldn't really hear what she was saying very well.

Something about wanting to see all she could see while she could and touch everything she could. She was saying that she was leaving in a few hours that she and her dad had come to visit my uncle who was living in Granddad's 'little cottage' next door that summer.

I was a shy kid, at least when it came to girls I didn't know. Girls seemed a bit strange and yet incredibly special and this one was more than special. Right there, sitting on the wicker chair, but not touchable, not by me, not in my lifetime.

It was the early 1950's and a kid like me could look and dream but dared not touch.

Then she said she'd like to walk to the dock and feel how cold the water was. I jumped up and offered to walk down to the dock with her. It was hard to believe. She actually smiled at me and said it would be her pleasure!

We crossed the railroad track and down the steps to the dock we went, not too fast, not too quick. In fact she walked very slowly. I wanted to stop the clock and stop time and just enjoy this incredibly beautiful and pleasant young woman. I wanted to touch her hair and hold her in my arms, but I was just fantasizing, that couldn't really be an option. Wow, would my friends be impressed with the charm and beauty of this pretty southern belle!

She paused on the steps, stooped and carefully picked some mint leaves and then reached out to share some with me. "Smell them" she said. "Life is wonderful, its so great to be in such a lovely place". I can't put her southern accent into words here but if ever a young man was instantly in love it was me and this was the time and the place. This young woman was more than attractive, she was magic. She had instantly stolen my heart and maybe even my soul.

We walked very slowly past the boat house and then out onto the dock. First we sat on the bench under the willow tree Granddad had transplanted there the year I was born, then we moved to sit on a blanket that my cousin had left near the middle of my Granddad's grass covered dock.

She carefully spread the blanket out as if it hurt her to reach her arms. Then she asked if I'd hang on to her while she reached over the side to feel the water.... And I did. And she did. When she stood back up I wanted to pull her into my arms, but I dared not.

No one had ever acted this way, said these things, been so pretty and reached out to me like this and now I knew this was a living angel and even looked like one.

There was more small talk and then she reached and took my hand as she got up. She held my hand tightly as we walked very slowly back to the little house, the cottage where her uncle lived. No girl had ever held my hand so firmly. It was as if she were afraid I'd let go.

Somehow I found the courage to ask for her address. Suddenly she turned and looked at me very sadly with those vibrant blue eyes and softly said, "My address is Heaven". That's what she said. Then she said "I have to go now, cause my dad and I have to visit everyone before I leave". There seemed to be tears in her eyes and and its for sure there were tears in my heart. Somehow I got the courage to tell her I didn't want her to leave. "Couldn't she stay a few days?" There was no answer. She just looked at me, then turned away.

A little later, she, my uncle and her dad climbed in my uncles old car and she was gone. I waved and she waved back, smiling brightly. The next day my uncle returned and I asked him for her address.

In in that slow deep southern drawl of his he said that she and her dad were visiting all their relatives before she was gone forever, that she had incurable cancer. He told me she had only a few weeks to live, that her kind of cancer was fatal and that her family had chosen not to put her though the pain of some of the more outrageous cancer treatments which in those days were even worse than treatment is today.

I didn't want my uncle to see my tears. I turned and walked away. I walked and walked and walked some more. I felt a terrible burden of pain and mixed up emotions I had never experienced before and rarely felt since.

Over the decades since then, every time I visited our family dock, and it was many thousands of times, I remembered. I remembered this especially beautiful human being and her intense beauty and her quiet dignity.

I remember today also, this very special and very brave and very courageous young woman from Memphis.

Today I too have cancer and the clock is ticking. And while I'd like to believe I have a little courage, its not a fraction of that shown by the incredible smile and will of that beautiful young woman from Memphis.

1941 - 1945 Breakfast At Grandma Anderson's House: The War Years

Breakfast At Grandma's I stumbled past old Al's room and down the back steps led by scents of heaven pulling me nose first right down those very dark and somewhat creaky oak boards. I stumbled a bit more and landed on the kitchen floor almost knocking old Al the cook over.

I didn't have a cook, but my Granddad did and we called him Al. Granddad had been as poor as a church mouse when he and Grandma were kids in the 1870's, but he worked very hard and in the America of the late 1800's and early 1900's he had succeeded pretty well. This time he had left Emma and his other maids at his winter house in the city (picture below) but old Al came to the lake every summer with Granddad and Grandma.

Old Al seemed sober today and I couldn't see any bottles of aftershave or whatever he'd been drinking sticking out of his pocket. With the wonderful scents of today's breakfast in the air I certainly didn't notice his breath, at least this time. Al liked his booze but never drank when Granddad was in town as Granddad spent only a few days a week at the lake and the rest of the time he was in town and his "city place". Working or so I guessed.

I was a kid back then during the War and not supposed to know what booze was and I don't think Grandma ever told Granddad about Al's drinking.

Al lifted the burner top on the big wood stove (there were 2 wood stoves, one on the porch, one in the kitchen) and threw another log into the stove.

It was summertime and we were living at Granddad's country house and yes granddad had come back from fishing that morning, cleaned the fish on the old log down by the chicken coop, changed his clothes, put on a clean white shirt, and was standing in the dining room tapping his barometer. The huge skillets were full of today's catch. In the oven and warmer on top of the kitchen stove were huge brown rolls and a loaf of very fresh yeast bread.

Al moved the fish to the oven to keep them warm and began frying the ham and bacon, both freshly sliced and the eggs would soon join the covered rolled oats and pancakes on the dining room table.

"Son", Al said, "cover the rolls and carry em to the table and fetch me some more wood and I'll save a special treat for you... and by the way... fetch me some water if you could and chip some ice for your Grandfather." Granddad wanted his coffee very hot and his water very cold.

Al called almost everyone who was a kid, son. Even the younger girl cousins. He called the men, my uncles and other older cousins, Mister and the lady folks Missus even if they weren't married. We got the water from a well near the garage about 150 feet from the house. I had got real sick from that well last year and I hoped Granddad would have a new one dug soon. Granddad had said he would and he always kept his word.

The dining room table was set for only 3 today. Granddad, Grandma and me. Some days it would be set for 12 or more and some days the kids like me had to eat in the kitchen when there were too many adults (or always when we were at Granddad's city house where all children, until they were 10 ate in the kitchen). In the summer at his cottage, which we called the big house, Granddad seemed more relaxed. He bent the rules and we were welcome in the dining room and just about every where else. Back then Granddad owned about 50 acres of land adjoining his house. Years later when he was much older, folks conned him out of much of the waterfront and even the house we were sitting in. But those days weren't here yet and we enjoyed every moment at the lake.

Grandma gave me a hug, then sat down. Then Granddad sat down, then me. It was a ritual, no one sat down till Grandma did.

The sun had just come up fully and the light bounced off the lake and then off the mirror and into my eyes. Grandma saw me squinting and said I must need glasses.

There was new flypaper hanging from the chandelier above the table but no bugs were stuck to it. The faint sound of a small outboard motor down on the lake and the much louder sounds of morning doves, and of birds everywhere chirping and singing were familiar and reassuring. There were no air raid sirens out here in the country and even Grandma's canaries were singing. Back in those days, before the invention of modern bug sprays, there were 100's and even thousands of birds everywhere. I knew cause in years to come I would be the one chasing the crows and blackbirds from our cornfield or the Starlings from the birdhouse Granddad had built for the Purple Martins. The world was alive and living and I had heard of John James Audubon and viewed the pictures in his books long before I was 5 years old.

There was no TV playing that summer morning cause TV's weren't in use yet and World War II was on. When we were sitting at the table there were always conversations and many were about the war. About everything new. Like Freddie being sent to the Pacific to bomb the Japs and not being able to buzz the cottage every afternoon in his B17 which he usually did during Granddad's nap time. There was one talking rule though. If you spoke of troubles or something bad at the table, you had to get up and leave. Grandma said meals were meant by God to be happy times. And no unhappy talk was ever allowed.

In the evenings, we'd stain to listen above the static to the radio in the living room. We'd hear the news or Fibber Magee & Molly or maybe put a roll in the player piano. The phonograph was a crank up job and I wasn't allowed to play with it or even crank it up. 

Grandad's City house (Photo 2008 but it hasn't changed much) But I never ever saw Freddie again or felt the house shake when he flew low over it. His plane crashed somewhere in the Pacific and Freddie and his enthusiasm and laughter would be gone forever, but living eternally in our memories.

It was early morning now though and there seemed enough food for 10 people. Granddad had his own chickens, chicken coop and pen and the fish, fresh from the lake, were as fresh as the eggs. Granddad got up every morning at 4:30 or so and went fishing.  Once in a while, if I had been very very good I would be asked to join him.

If you've never eaten real fresh food, freshly cooked on a wood stove, you've missed something very rich in much more than flavor and taste.

Granddad said grace, then we all dug in. I don't know how many calories I ate (or for that matter Granddad and Grandma ate) for breakfast in those days but it must have been a huge number for all of us. I was thin though, maybe because I got to earn a little extra money by working outside all morning then playing hard all afternoon. Granddad too was very thin too but Grandma, well, she was more on the slightly plump side.

The cholesterol count would have been so high a modern MD would pass out. But the food was freshly grown or caught, natural, no additives. We ate real butter and real everything. We lived a real life. There was no plastic, no oleo, no trans fats, and little or no junk food. Most of the things we eat today hadn't been invented or if they had no one would have chosen to eat them!

I miss those days. I miss Granddad and Grandma and old Al and the fineness and wafting scents and sounds of a world long gone but still vivid in my mind. Where folks had time to have a real breakfast and time to hug and enjoy their emotions and the great and wonderful gifts of nature. Where the smells of cooking filled the house with hunger and anticipation and old Al's recipes meant food fit for the Gods and there were lots of kids who were blessed with Grandparents like mine.

In my mind I have thousands and thousands of hidden memories waiting to be rediscovered and in a way, relived. I can somehow smell the scent of the fresh country morning air after a night so clear the the Northern Lights danced all night. And most every night sky was filled with brilliant stars and a shining moon so brilliant that it almost hurt your eyes. I can close my eyes and see Grandma sitting on the front porch in her wooden rocking chair with one of the Grand kids dozing in her arms and her knitting resting on her lap.

I can still see Granddad walking up from the boathouse with a stringer of fresh perch and grinning from ear to ear.

If I can listen very carefully I somehow think I hear my Grandparents speaking very softly as they both did when they put loving arms around me so many times.

To offer reassurance and dignity and guide all of their grandchildren gently and surely toward this great journey we call life.

America's Heritage: Growing Up... With Family Values

 Muskee - Grandad At The Lake 1910 Granddad Anderson with a muskee he caught on Aug 2, 1910...

He was born in Iowa in 1870 (some say) or 1872 (others say). Granddad was my friend, my mentor, and along with Grandma, perhaps they were the most important people in my life.


Grandma hugged a lot but didn't say too much, instead setting an example of how a grandma should be. Granddad didn't hug quite as much but had a lot of incredibly important things to say and even more to teach his grandchildren.

In a quiet loving and very special way, they taught me about life, about our country, about our wonderful world. Most importantly, they taught something intangible called values and respect and dignity.

Granddad showed me (and many of his 28 other grand kids) how to plant corn and prune an apple tree. How to hunt and fish, how to work, how to pray, and the importance of respect. Grandma, how to hug, love, care and cry.

When with Granddad or Grandma, I was showered in respect, dignity, courage, love and all the other great attributes they had learned growing up in Iowa then moving east around 1895.

Granddad was a self educated, self made, serenely quiet man. In his city house he had over 1000 books in his library, and he had read them all.  He loved poetry, billiards, hunting, fishing, drawing, flowers, gardening and most of all his wife and family.  He was very stern, but also very warm.  His concepts of responsibility and wisdom and hard work brought him to the world of both financial and personal success. The Times described him as a "Pittsburgh Industrialist" but to me he was just Granddad.


Truth is, he didn't seem to be interested in money or financial success, or it least he never showed it. He usually wore a somewhat wrinkled white shirt, but skipped the tie when working in his garden or tending his flowers and dozens of fruit trees. He taught me practical things like how to sharpen a scythe and cut the fields, trim a mulberry tree and shoot the crows that raided our corn. Where can a city kid like me get an education like that? And he taught me something called values. More about that later.

Like Granddad, Grandma was quiet, warm and loving. Most of the time she had one of her Grand kids or Great Grand kids in her arms or her knitting on her lap, sitting in the rocking chair on the front porch enjoying the breeze and overlooking the lake at their summer house. If she was not there, she was upstairs sewing on her treadle Singer sewing machine.

When I was little I also visited Granddad in the winter almost every weekend at his "City House". I'd climb the first flight of stairs past the stained glass windows on the landing to the library, then up another flight of stairs to granddad's billiard room where across from the cue rack and spittoon was a very large play area for kids.


Across from the door to the billiard room was Uncle Ave's room. Ave worked at Granddad's factory and had been wounded and badly scarred by mustard gas in world war I. Ave shied away from some people. Like Granddad he painted beautiful pictures, some in the style of Frederick Remington. When Ave came home from the War, his wife took their kids and took off with one of her unscarred boyfriends.

Over in the billiard room there were hundreds of children's building blocks and giant block towers waiting to be built and come crashing down, only to be built again in a newer and better way. There were pen and ink drawings on the wall that Granddad had drawn and some of Ave's western paintings. There was a huge blackboard showing diagrams of Willie Hoppe's angles for 3 cushion billiards that we grand kids couldn't touch and boxes and boxes of toys that we could, should and did touch and enjoy.

In those long winters I spent many a weekend snuggled upstairs in his library pouring though almost a thousand books. That was before TV and there was plenty of time for Granddad's stories and rocking in his giant rocking chair. Stories of how the Indians had scalped an older sister in Colorado. Of growing up in the years after Abe Lincoln. Of children that had perished when Grandma and Granddad had moved east and of men and their dreams. Of cherishing but not too much. Of religions and of Moses and Abraham, of Mathew, Mark, Luke and John and Peter and all the rest. Of the lessons and philosophies of history. Archimedes, Socrates and Plato. Science, Philosophy, Poetry and Music. Of John James Audubon. Of twisting 4 dials on an old floor model crystal radio that had giant tubes and even a speaker. Of joy, happiness and later sorrow and weeping. Sadness and tears when a cousin died in the war and endless weeping when Grandma died a few years after the war ended.

I wept too, not just when family or friends died, but when winter weekends (or the summer season) ended and I had to go back to my parents home and the terrible fear and trauma of their sadistic world of abuse and greed, hate and anger. That was a far different world the the security of my Grandparents home.

In later years I would come to realize that Granddad and Grandma knew the abuse was going on in my parents home and that they both tried to keep me away from my own family as much as possible. In those days there were no social service agencies. And in those days of old, families tried to take care of their own problems.

I grew up to be a teacher, a professor and a businessman. And for every day of the more than 70 years I have been here sharing God's good earth, I appreciate more and more the memories and wonderful experiences and philosophies given so gracefully to me by Granddad and Grandma.


So in a way, this short story and this blog are a way of thanking my Grandparents. I offer a special thanks to those wonderful Grandparents who took time out of their lives for me and 28 other grand kids. It would take much more than a Blog or even a book to tell all they taught me, all they did for me.

Photo Footnote:

Pic og granddads city house taken in 2008.

<< Photo of Granddads city house in Ben Avon as it looks in 2008.

He bought it in 1906 and sold it shortly before his death in 1954. 

Outwardly not much has changed except the back porch was replaced with a newer modern one and some updates to the patio.

In the old days the lot next door was also granddads and had a large gazebo and incredible flower gardens.

America The Beautiful: A Time Of Memories

Ole Dave's Growing Up In America Blog -

The stories of growing up in America above are all true. The names, and exact places eliminated or shortened to respect the privacy of all.

In addition to this blog, I hope you will use the links in the left column to visit my other web sites and blogs.

I alos invite comments including those of your own memories and experiences.